Breastfeeding as a Believer - A Christian Perspective

I generally keep quiet regarding issues unless I truly have an opinion of value.  An opinion that is strong enough for me to feel it can benefit someone else.  And this would be such a time.

I have been blessed with the ability to feed 3 babies via my breasts.  I truly count that as a blessing and I am glad to have had support for breastfeeding in every place where I have lived.  But this blog is not about the actual act of breastfeeding.  It is about breasts.  It is about sin.  It is about discretion.

Don’t get me wrong.  The Bible does say that breastfeeding is comforting as evidenced here in Isaiah 66:10-13 - “Rejoice with Jerusalem and be glad for her, all you who love her; rejoice greatly with her, all you who mourn over her.  For you will nurse and be satisfied at her comforting breasts; you will drink deeply and delight in her overflowing abundance.”  For this is what the LORD says: “I will extend peace to her like a river, and the wealth of nations like a flooding stream; you will nurse and be carried on her arm and dandled on her knees.  As a mother comforts her child, so will I comfort you; and you will be comforted over Jerusalem.”  Obviously, Christ views breastfeeding as good.  Again, this is not about breastfeeding, it is about modesty.

Do I breastfeed in public?  Yes.  Do I feel that a woman should ever have to go to a bathroom stall, closet, or other “hidden” area to nurse?  No.  But do I feel comfortable showing my whole breast to the world?  No.  And I will tell you why – because the Bible tells me not to.

So then why does it make me uncomfortable for a woman to pop out her entire breast in a public place?  Because of my son.  It’s funny how children can put a person in check.  My son has opened my eyes to things that never before would have even been a fleeting thought.  Many of you will say that breastfeeding is natural and non-sexual, and I agree.  When a woman feeds her child she is generally not doing it with the intention of causing lustful thoughts in others.  There is indeed nothing about breastfeeding that is sexual.  But there is something sexual about breasts. 

God created Eve to be a help meet to Adam.  In doing so He created us to be pleasing to one another.  It is not by accident that breasts are sexually exciting to men.  That excitement however should be reserved for a husband to have for his wife.  Period.  In the beginning of time breasts would not have caused man to have sinful thoughts, because there was no sin.  But from the Fall of man, nakedness was no longer innocent.  The world we live in today is a world of lust.  Look around you at the millions of people involved in pornography and prostitution in one way or another.  Look at how sexuality is portrayed in magazines, tv, movies, etc.  Do not tell me that the sight of a breast does not conjure up sexual thoughts, specifically to the male gender.  Men are visual.  Anybody with any sense of the two sexes knows this to be true. 

1 John 2:16-  For everything in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—comes not from the Father but from the world.


Consider the calling in Romans 14:13-23 -  ¹³ Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in the way of a brother or sister. ¹⁴ I am convinced, being fully persuaded in the Lord Jesus, that nothing is unclean in itself. But if anyone regards something as unclean, then for that person it is unclean. ¹⁵ If your brother or sister is distressed because of what you eat, you are no longer acting in love. Do not by your eating destroy someone for whom Christ died. ¹⁶ Therefore do not let what you know is good be spoken of as evil. ¹⁷ For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit, ¹⁸ because anyone who serves Christ in this way is pleasing to God and receives human approval.  ¹⁹ Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification. ²⁰ Do not destroy the work of God for the sake of food. All food is clean, but it is wrong for a person to eat anything that causes someone else to stumble. ²¹ It is better not to eat meat or drink wine or to do anything else that will cause your brother or sister to fall. ²² So whatever you believe about these things keep between yourself and God.  Blessed is the one who does not condemn himself by what he approves. ²³ But whoever has doubts is condemned if they eat, because their eating is not from faith; and everything that does not come from faith is sin.


In order to love our neighbor as we are commanded (Matthew 22:38-40) look at verse 15 from above.  If I know that men/boys may see my breast and have anxiety over a desire that may stir, have I not contributed to their feeling of being distressed?  And again, in verse 20, if my breast exposure leads to unclean thoughts am I not partially to blame?

We as Christians are called upon to keep each other in check in Ephesians 4:25 "Therefore, laying aside falsehood, speak truth, each one of you, with his neighbor, for we are members of one another.”  And many women I know do indeed help fellow Christian women to know if their choices in apparel are too revealing or sexy.  But when it comes to breastfeeding women seem so afraid to point out that nakedness is nakedness.  Yes, feeding a baby is completely natural.  And yes, in other cultures women are topless at all times.  I realize it is the norm in some societies that a baby is almost always attached to a breast and there is no modesty involved.  However, I don’t live in that culture.  And our culture has oversexed the female breast to the point that even feeding a baby can be seen by some men as sexual.  Is it right?  No.  Is it fair?  No.  But it doesn’t change the reality of what it is. 

 

I nurse in public often, because my baby needs to eat.  Plain and simple.  I do not always wear a nursing cover.  I do not fear what people will think of me for nursing in public.  And I am sure that somewhere at some point either in the past or future, my entire breast will be seen by someone.  I can only do what I can do – and what I can do is to look around and evaluate my audience.  I can take into account if a hormonal adolescent is (or probably will be) in the immediate area, and can take a moment to ensure modesty that may keep him from sinful thinking.  For we are all accountable to God for not only ourselves, but for the actions we do that cause others to stumble from the path of righteousness.  As a mother of boys, it is important for me to be in tune with God’s desire for their lives.  1 Thessalonians 4:3 says, "It is God's will that you should be sanctified, that you should avoid sexual immorality, that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen who do not know God. God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. Therefore, he who rejects this instruction does not reject man, but God who gives you His Holy Spirit."  If I know that this is God’s will, then how can I ignore my own responsibility in guiding young men toward purity?


I will say I am keeping my main point focused on adolescent boys, because I typically think of my son in regards to this issue as we are entering the days of puberty.  I do know that men need to be considered as well.  I would hope that a man who has grown accustomed to his hormones (teenagers have not) and who professes to love the Lord would not be tempted by women other than his wife.  I would hope that he has the ability to simply not “see” the breast in front of him, and would look elsewhere – mature Christians are Biblically led to take every thought captive and to make it obedient to God (2 Corinthians 10:5).  However, Romans 7:21-23 makes it clear that temptation is very much a problem even for a Christian.  “So I find this law at work: Although I want to do good, evil is right there with me.  For in my inner being I delight in God’s law; but I see another law at work in me, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within me.”  If the apostle Paul struggled with the law of sin then I am sure the Christian men of today do also.  And regarding non-Christian men, I do not want to encourage him in ways that are separating him from a relationship with Christ.  Since I am judged solely by the Lord for my own actions, I can do my part in preventing his stumbling by being modest.  For me, this is also an act of love to my sisters in Christ.  I want others’ marriages to thrive and not be hindered by something I do, even something as “innocent” as breastfeeding.


If you believe that you are judged by God solely on your intentions, and contend that since you don’t intend for others to feel lust by the mere sight of your breasts and therefore their lustful thinking of you is in no way your fault, then I encourage you to examine your heart.  We are to love those around us, and if we care not how our actions affect others then are we truly loving our neighbors?   


This entire blog was prompted when I was told by another breastfeeding mom, “Oh you don’t need to cover up for me.”  It wasn’t for her that I was slipping on the nursing cover – it was for the benefit of the people passing by.


To touch upon the inevitable comments to come –

·         I do believe that God gave us breasts to feed children.

·         This blog is not about whether to breastfeed or not, nor is about what I feel in regards to bottle feeding. (just in case you are wondering, I don’t care whether people choose to breastfeed or bottle feed, just feed your baby!)

·         This blog is not an attack on anyone, nor was it prompted to be written by any person’s behavior in particular.

·         For anyone wanting to give me Biblical insight, please do!  I believe I always have room to grow as a Christian and welcome sound understanding of scripture.

·         I believe we as a society have adopted an attitude of no personal responsibility – everything is someone else’s fault.  I do not believe that is the attitude God wants me to have. 

·         I have friends who run the gamut from extreme modesty in breastfeeding (those who pump at home to feed in bottles in public) to those who bare it all (literally drop their top completely while nursing) – I love you all and do not mean the opinions here as a judgment of you.  I simply felt compelled to share what I feel the Lord placed on my heart.

·         I do my best to nurse my baby with a sense of modesty – however, there have been times when I have not had a cover or when my clothing has not cooperated – I apologize if you have personally seen too much of me.  Generally speaking my child’s head covers me.

·         Breastfeeding mothers - I am not writing this to judge you or to jeopardize a friendship with you.  I am only sharing a viewpoint that I feel God wants me to share.

Now, go feed your baby :-)